The phone call came at 8:45 am. Molly had returned from her morning walk and was found unresponsive in the living room. Three hours later a call confirmed that the resuscitation efforts were futile. 

My entire being broke, Molly had gone, we hadn’t forgiven one another.

The emails from Molly had started 12 months prior to her passing. Addressed to my husband, myself and directed towards my family her heart was laid bare in the font. The words were offensive and cruel. But I knew my friend’s history and I chose not to respond on the premise that “hurting people, hurt people”. Molly had lost her son 2 years prior and her mother, within the last year. I knew that not only was she suffering from her past hurts but her losses had also contributed to her written outbursts. 

My husband acted as the buffer and told me that if there was anything I needed to address he would inform me. There was nothing for me to address.

Two weeks before Christmas and two months before her passing I had a mediumship reading, hoping to hear from my mum, I was surprised that Jake, Molly’s son came through. The medium described his boyish tendencies beautifully. Then I heard him clearly say to me “I want you and my Mum to be friends again”. The medium was unaware of Jake’s message. I left the reading determined to follow through on his request.

That evening I was flicking through my digital photos and I came across several unprocessed portraits of Molly’s mother and Jake. I knew she didn’t have these images as I had deemed them ‘not perfect’ enough to share. The following day the images were printed, professionally framed, wrapped and topped with a Christmas card.

The words were simple.

Life is short…an old friend.

The package was dropped off at her sisters home where I knew she would be for Christmas. The holidays came and went, no word from Molly, no reconciliation, no words of forgiveness. Then, the call, she had gone in a literal heartbeat.

I took Molly’s passing so hard, I was physically ill for a week, the thought that she still held animosity towards my family and myself tore my soul apart. It would be months later before I had the courage to ask her sister about her reaction to the photos.

“Anita, she was so happy that you had reached out to her. She had sent you an email. But it had bounced back. Molly had decided that it was a sign, that It was not the right time.”

As I write It’s coming up to the anniversary of her transition. Within a practice session last week my practice medium partner brought Molly through. With tears in her eyes, she said “Molly is giving you a big hug, and she says she is sorry”.

Life is short, forgive.